Collide
by SoraxKairi7
Summary: Vanitas is such an arrogant sap.


**A/N:** This one-shot is a gift to my 100th reviewer for my story Final Call, _TwilightIsn'tLiterature_! (I love that screen name, lols) She has been very supportive to me so I wanted to do something for her! Go check out her page! Here's the VanKai oneshot I promised! I hope you all enjoy it!

O-o-o

**Collide**

O-o-o

_**Vanitas' POV.**_

O-o-o

"Your dimples are showing. You look more idiotic than Sora on a sugar high."

God I hate it when she points out my dimples. It's like she's asking me to tickle her to death.

Back off, Kairi. I'll do it—and I _won't_ stop myself from touching you in all the wrong places and then blaming it on your inability to stay still. I know you're the most ticklish person out there (thanks to my brother Sora, a.k.a. Your ex-boyfriend that so blatantly stomped on your heart by dating your best friend right after you). That's right, I applauded him for the dick move—you had it coming sooner or later. Sora had the hots for her _way_ before he even hit puberty. Think it's not true? Well you haven't seen his diary. There were pages among pages about the little blonde girl down the street that gave him cooties on various occasions when you weren't around. I never told you this because, well... I just liked the view.

I liked seeing you cry over him for days, saying how badly you wished the world would end when really, there was a freaking bird chirping happily just outside your window that you expressed such adoration for (unless you secretly wished a fiery death upon that bird, then we would have to talk). You didn't do your hair or makeup and you stopped being vegetarian for like two weeks. That little pink dress didn't look so good on you then; to be honest you looked pregnant and I was about to set up an audition with the Maury show. Yeah, go ahead and call me a jerk.

Maybe my amusement with your distress was merely because I just liked holding you so much. You practically fell into my arms every chance you got; I didn't have to ask or say anything to cheer you up. (If it wasn't painfully obvious how much I really liked you I would have probably taken way more advantage of the situation than I did). All I had to do was pat your head with an occasional tap on the butt and I was good. I didn't even listen to half of the words you said because I was too busy staring at the cleavage that seems to show itself more and more each year. I'm not the _romantic_ or _sweet_ type like Sora claims to be; in fact, I'm quite the opposite. Even Riku pointed it out multiple times to you—I'm just plain mean.

"Vanitas, if you don't get over here I'm going to slit your throat." Kairi threatened. Whoa, calm down there, missy. She was trying on clothes for the fifteenth time this week (maybe not that many times but god, it felt like ages and she didn't even wear anything remotely sexy). "I'm looking for a dress for the first day of school. I think I'm going to try and get Sora back..." Kairi twirled around in her yellow dress, but her disappointed facial expression said otherwise.

"I told you, Sora has moved on. He doesn't love you. To be honest, he never really did."

Again—I don't know how to be nice. Ain't nobody got time for that. It's like a disease that filters out all of the happy thoughts and replaces them with the spawns of the devil that are setting up camp and chilling out on each shoulder. They tell me what to do and say at every waking moment and sometimes haunt me in my dreams.

I could see Kairi tearing up in the mirror. You know, I wish she would be a little more accepting and way less sensitive. It would make my job easier, but then I go back to my previous point. I get to touch her.

"Vanitas, you're such a douche bag. I don't know any girl in the world that would want to date you."

"Assuming that would mean that you in fact _knew_ every girl in the world, I would have to say that I find that highly unlikely. I bet I can ask out any girl in this store and she would date me in a heartbeat."

Kairi gave me that ever so doubtful look and of course I had to accept her challenge. I started scanning the store for my prize, but in truth, I only wanted the girl pouting at herself in the mirror.

Let me narrow that down a little more, since a lot of girls seem to do that in clothing stores, or any store... or just... in general.

"Alright, will you go out with me?" I asked Kairi.

"Hell no." she responded and returned to the dressing room. I followed her all the way back to the stall. She raised her eyebrow and shut the door right in my face.

"Aww, I wanted to see you undress!"

"Perv!" Kairi called out. I saw her dress hit the floor. An employee shooed me out of the fitting room, threatening to kick me out of the store. I merely laughed. It was hilarious. "Oh... crap. This isn't my stall... Vanitas, could you hand me my clothes?"

"No can do, Kairi. I'm not allowed in there."

"Oh, for god sakes..."

I heard her grunting. "What are you going to do? Crawl under the stall and retrieve your clothes?"

"Yes, in fact I am."

Just then, I rushed into the stall she was about to crawl into and shut the door. I "disguised" my voice so it sounded high pitched. "Sorry, this one is occupied!" I felt quite satisfied with myself.

"Argh, you stupid jerk! Just give me my clothes!" Kairi demanded from the other side.

"You should have been paying more attention!" I teased; her blue T-shirt and white shorts in my hand. Alright, now I was bored so I hung the shirt over the top of the stall. "Can you reach it?"

"I'm not _that_ short." Kairi grabbed her shirt and put it on. "Now give me the rest of it."

"You have to say please."

"Please?!" Kairi said impatiently.

"With cherries on top?"

"God, you're starting to piss me off."

"Then just go on a date with me."

"Why? So you can degrade and humiliate me some more?"

"Not what I had in mind, but that can be arranged, starting with these shorts. You do realize that the length of them gives every guy an opportunity to see your ass-crack?" I held up the shorts in front of my face for examination.

"_Vanitas!_"

"Fine... you're no fun." I started putting the shorts over the stall, but held onto them before she could grab them. "Answer my question."

"What question?!"

Gosh, why were you so dense?! I didn't want to repeat it, but I had a feeling she would accept simply because she didn't want to walk around in her underwear. "Well, this is our last day before you go off to that preppy university, so go on a freaking date with me tonight."

"Whatever!"

"Is that a yes?"

"...yes!"

That's more like it.

O-o-o

When I asked Kairi out on a date, I didn't expect the complicated formalities that proceeded this action. Apparently I had to pick the time _and_ place, and depending on what that place was, I would then have to inform Kairi of a dress code, which would prompt even more shopping due to full closet nothing to wear syndrome (as she so inexplicably put it). On top of that, I would have to pay for her meal, which knowing her, she would only scrape at like a picky child.

There are children in Africa waiting to devour the food that she chooses to be so against eating. Maybe I should put Kairi in a box and ship her over there to serve it to them. At least she would be making herself useful and the poor food would have some stomachs to land in instead of innocent trash cans.

Kairi, no matter what I say, you are _not fat_. Get the freak over yourself. I just like to mess with you and push your buttons because you're so freaking cute when you retaliate.

Anyway, this was my last chance not to screw anything up. I wouldn't see Kairi for god knows how long and I bet she expects me to make this night the best night of her life, right? Gosh, why did I have to ask her out? Why...? It's too much work and it feels more like a chore than an opportunity to get to second base. Can't we just skip to the good part? I would have asked Sora for some tips on what Kairi likes and doesn't like, but I felt like that was just knocking on trouble's door. Kairi may have been my best friend that I just so happened to find attractive, but that didn't mean I knew every single detail about her. Did I _really_ need to know?

And what if I wanted to be cheap and go to McDonalds? Because that's certainly within my budget. We could go to the play area, block off all of the entrances to the top and I can make out with her. Our shadows and moans would taunt those children for ages and I would get what I want without having to spend more than ten bucks. I don't understand the guys that take their girl out to the fanciest restaurants, come home, don't get anything for it but a simple kiss on the cheek and then are left on the doorstep to wallow in their failures. I refuse to go down that way.

Kairi Hikari was going to be mine tonight.

"Vanitas, you were supposed to be at my house an hour ago!" Kairi's angry voice echoed through the phone; it was enough to knock the Eiffel Tower off its hinges. "You still haven't told me if I have to dress casual, or dressy casual, or fancy, pin up or formal!"

I felt like we had been talking about clothes all day and I just wished it would stop. Why would I give a flying fuck about what you wanted to wear? As long as I got to take it off of you, don't bother me with the details!

"Just wear something sexy!"

Because that narrowed it down. Kairi could wear enough clothes to survive the arctic winters and still look hot. Honestly, I haven't even decided where to go yet. I was hoping she would give me some sort of direction. I was still trying to figure out how I was going to tell Kairi that she was the only girl I wanted to be with. That in itself could keep me occupied for years (like it already has). The ways of attraction and dating have always eluded me and I wasn't willing to start learning. I wanted to do things my own way on my own time.

"Well, what are you wearing?" she asked. Why was this so god damn important?!

"A black T-shirt and jeans. Oh, and I made sure to wear the candy corn boxers."

"What the hell? You always wear that!"

"Kairi, put something on. I will be there in ten minutes and you'd better be ready. I'm not going to play games with you anymore."

"You do know that I can't stay out late, right? I'm leaving tomorrow morning."

Thanks for reminding me.

"I'm going now." Right before I left, I switched into a black buttoned up shirt instead of my casual T-shirt. She'd better be happy with this.

o-o-o

I think I bring out the worst in my redheaded best friend, because as soon as I pulled into the Steak n' Shake parking lot, she began complaining. Of course, I fed into that anger with my own comebacks and then volcanoes erupted and killed thousands of people in their wake. Okay, that last part was a bit of an over-exaggeration but Kairi has to understand that...

"I've never been on an actual date before, so sue me!"

Apparently this one simple sentence made her fits of rage magically disappear. She stared at me with dreamily eyes and a loud squeal of excitement filled my eardrums. "AWW!"

If I were to tell her my innermost feelings, would she react with the same amount of delight?

I was prepared to cover it up at any cost if anything but that happened, but I _had_ to do it tonight. I couldn't let Kairi leave tomorrow without at least knowing.

Alright, I guess I do have a serious side. You just have to dig through a bunch of bullshit to get there, that's all.

"If that's the case, then thank you for bringing me here." Kairi said, smiling at me. "But next time, I'm going to expect you to take it up a notch."

"Next time?" I asked, confusion written all over my face as I stepped out of the pick up truck. Kairi giggled from the other side and came over to me. She wore some purple tank top and skinny jeans than accented her figure quite nicely in my opinion and her hair was pulled back. There was a butterfly clip in her hair that really made her even more beautiful, but she would never hear that from me.

"What do they have here?" Kairi asked upon stepping into the restaurant. I looked around for a booth near the back and found one. The waitress led us over to it.

"Burgers and shit."

"Vanitas..." Kairi eyed me as if there was something I missed. "I don't eat meat, dairy or anything like that. I'm a vegetarian."

"They have salads, so hush." I hid my face in the menu. I didn't want to show her how nervous I was.

"Even salads can be filled with calories."

"I guess you'll just be eating leaves, then. I might as well have just taken you to the park. You can make an extravagant dish out of the dead plant life."

"As a matter of fact, I _could_." she responded daringly. I glanced up from the menu in disbelief. "Oh well, I guess I can't complain. This is actually the nicest you've ever been to me."

Me? Nice? Woman, didn't I already say that word is nowhere in my vocabulary?

"Are you on something? Let me have what you're taking." I halfway joked.

"Oh, Vani... why don't you try a salad?" Kairi asked eagerly, reaching across the table to take my menu and point to the salad section. I frowned in disgust as she read off my options. I liked meat. I liked calories. I liked stuffing my face until my insides wanted to burst. "Just try the chicken salad. You would like it!"

"I'm not spending six bucks on that." I responded. "I'm going to get a burger."

"Eww..." Kairi sat back in disappointment. The waitress came over and asked for our orders. Before I could say anything, Kairi ordered the damn chicken salad for me. I opened my mouth to protest, but she kicked my feet with hers from underneath the table. The waitress left and my final opportunity to back out was gone. I glared at her with the utmost fury, but she merely giggled and started looking over the shakes.

"What the hell?" I was not amused.

"That's for not giving me my clothes when I asked for them."

"So we're back to that? Fine, you're paying then."

Kairi shook her head. "Wrong again! You asked me out on this date, so you have to pay."

Crap... she got me again.

That's when Kairi sighed and stared out the window. "I'm bored now." I couldn't tell if she was really bored or dancing with the little rabbits in la la land, because Kairi Hikari never says what she means and never means what she says.

At least that's what I have concluded, anyway.

If I was going to confess my undying love for her, it had to at least be clear enough to get the message across. But I still didn't have a clue as to how to do it—or _why_ I even bothered to try. She was going to Twilight University on a four year scholarship and I would be stuck here going to the local community college. At most I would only be able to see her over the summer or during Christmas breaks, if she even came back to the islands then. I couldn't see myself pursuing a long-distance relationship, either.

So _why bother_?

Because Kairi Hikari was like no other girl I had ever met in my life. She was the only one who could handle my sarcastic and crude humor and reciprocate with full force. She was the only girl I found to be modest, and strikingly beautiful at the same time. Okay, so she wasn't _always_ modest but it was enough to send me into a frenzy. She was the entire package and I deeply regret not telling her this sooner. I think I would be satisfied enough with just her knowing, but...

I just didn't have the guts. Why would she go for a terrible, perverted freak like me?

There was a reason why Sora always got the good girls. He was too freaking nice. He was smart, had the best grades and played on the sports team. With Sora, chivalry was very much alive and thriving. With me, I would shut the door in a girl's face and laugh about it before ever trying to be polite. I shunned the majority of extracurricular activities throughout my high school career (with the exception of chess). I couldn't stand being around people and my encounters with the opposite sex never lasted long. Why was I like this? I don't know. The whole idea of dating and relationships just annoyed the shit out of me, but when Kairi was around, all of that didn't seem to be so bad. With the exception of Sora breaking Kairi's heart, Sora was just way better than me at this. I truly thanked him for breaking it off with Kairi, but I knew I had to wait.

"I wonder what Twilight University is going to be like..." Kairi said aloud and I snapped out of my reverie. She was trying to start a conversation with me—a one-sided one might I add. I could tell she was really nervous about going to a new place all on her own.

"Well, if I need to beat the shit out of anyone, let me know and I'll be on that train in a split second."

There I go again—doing what I do best: being an overconfident jackass that can't even tell the girl he likes his true feelings.

Truthfully, I didn't want her to leave.

Our food came. I eyed the green things in my bowl carefully; I was afraid ants had already made a permanent home somewhere in there. The grilled chicken looked burnt and the bacon pieces were the only things that looked edible. Kairi watched me carefully, as if she was waiting for me to take the first bite.

You are _so_ lucky I like you...

I picked up my fork and stabbed it into the lettuce. As the atrocity inched closer to my taste buds, I mentally gagged. I tried to disguise my dislike for the green healthy thing and started chewing.

Slowly.

Kairi was surprised that I even went through with this without ordering a million burgers. "You really didn't have to do this. I would have taken it home and eaten it later, as well as paid for it..."

"Yuck!" Upon hearing that, I spit it out and immediately savored my Pepsi. The fizz bubbled on my tongue and the disgusting leafy taste that lingered in my mouth beforehand was gone. I started picking at the chicken and then realized that I had reprimanded Kairi for the same actions earlier—being overly picky.

I'm allowed to be a hypocrite. It's carved into my DNA... or however that works.

So before I was about to feel like this date officially sucked, it was time to let her know the truth. Kairi sat there quietly and ate her vegetarian salad and I figured there would be no better time than now. But when I opened my mouth to speak, nothing came out.

Damn it, I've practiced this in the mirror over and over, with and without note cards!

"Kairi, there's something I-"

"You've got something in your teeth." Kairi interrupted me as she sipped on her water. Way to ruin the moment.

Alright, just give me a few more seconds. I'll think of something.

O-o-o

By eleven o'clock, I still had not come up with a way to reveal it to her. Sure, I could just blurt it out, but that would be boring, unoriginal and would probably get me slapped. Actually, I didn't really see any way I could do this without her hand leaving marks on my face, so I mentally prepared myself for the altercation.

But my confidence was deteriorating by the second. I didn't stand a chance! I kept my eyes focused on the ocean in front of me.

"Vani, it's getting late. I need to go home." Kairi followed that with a yawn.

"Hold on." I pursed my lips together and nervously tried to come up with the right words. "Just... hold on a second..."

"What is it? You've been like this all night." Kairi noted, gathering her phone and her purse and trying to stand up. "Are you secretly in love with me or something? Just spit it out."

This was when I was supposed to deny it. This was when I was supposed to come up with some ludicrous excuse and point out everything wrong with her assumption, but I just couldn't.

"Come with me." I grabbed her hand and strung her along the shore line. Kairi tried to protest, but I didn't let go of her. I hoped that walking this out would help me gain some sort of strength, but it only made my heart race faster. I suddenly stopped and Kairi almost ran into me, but I turned around just in time and embraced her. The water hit our feet; I half expected Kairi to complain about her new jeans getting wet, but she didn't say a word. Without the slightest hesitation, I put both hands on her cheeks and slammed my lips onto hers. Kairi trembled against my torso as she tried to figure out what was going on. Her hands pushed against me and tried to fight it, but I only kissed her more. Eventually, she succumbed to it and became less tense. She wrapped her hands around my neck, leaned her head to the side and kissed me back.

"Vani... why...?" she asked after breaking away from me for a moment.

Oh come on, did you really have to question _everything?!_"

"Look, I'm just going to come out with this..." I scratched the back of my head. It was now or never. "Kairi, I like you. And I didn't want you to leave tomorrow without knowing that I sometimes think about you... well, I actually think about you a lot."

There, I said it. It was simple enough, I made my point. Case closed. Done.

Or so I thought.

"...why are you telling me this... now?"

Yes, I already went over this in my head. I get it, I was stupid to wait.

"Because telling you this was like dethroning my pride. Never have I given any girl the time of day like I have with you, and honestly, it freaking scared me. Okay?"

"What were you afraid of?" Kairi asked. Once again, she was the queen of questionnaires. I took this opportunity to plant my lips onto hers once again, but she broke away from me. "...I... hate you..." she said with tears in her eyes, then ran off. I stood there, dumbfounded and hurt as I tried to comprehend what just happened. As Kairi disappeared into the distance, all I could do was watch like an idiot.

Now what was I going to do...?!

o-o-o

I've considered befriending the stray feline that frequented my yard. That little fucker new how to get what it wanted simply because it was cute. Now that I thought about it, that was kind of how Kairi operated. She would pout, cry and then make up for it with her over the top aversions to reality. She knew exactly how to pull my heartstrings with one single gesture and I was made into a fool in a matter of seconds.

I almost knew how those guys on the doorstep felt.

I wanted to use the excuse that I indeed would never see Kairi again. I wanted to accept this and move on, but the multiple tosses and turns stated something deeper was going on and I didn't like it much. I wondered what time Kairi was leaving, and then, noting the fact that it was already four in the morning, I realized I didn't have much time left.

I had to make this right.

My conclusion was that she was only upset because I didn't tell her a long time ago. Okay, got that. But let's not drag this out. I had to make sure Kairi left today on good terms with me, because I sure as hell wasn't planning on explaining this sort of thing over the phone while she was surrounded by all of her new college friends.

I just wanted her to think about me every now and then. That would be nice.

So I did what any desperado would do in this situation, I brought out the big guns.

Well, not exactly, but the thought of going through with such a scheme would have worked if this was a Hollywood film. Those things just never made sense to me. If I were to go over to Kairi's house right now, throw a rock and her window and start jamming on my guitar, she would probably throw multiple items at me. I would get many bruises, be forced to go into a coma (depending on how heavy the items were and the amount of strength that Kairi had this early in the morning). Kairi taught me to never judge a book by its cover. She could be pretty fierce when she wanted to be.

So I prepared to go over to her house anyway, thinking I could come up with something on the way, or at least use improvisation to win her over.

Because that _totally_ worked before.

I felt like an entirely different person had taken over me. The little spawns on my shoulder were more silent than a school for the deaf. I was freaking out here. How in the world was I going to do this?!

So I employed the feline method.

Literally.

That ever so sweet orange, fluffy kitty was sleeping soundly behind my bushes. I never actually _pet_ the cat, but it seemed pretty inviting. Conveniently, my mom had an old pet carrier in the garage. I set it outside, put a towel inside and attracted it with treats. The cat inspected me for a while, then slowly got closer to the cage. I would have to be quick and close the door as soon as the cat got in, but I wasn't sure if I could do this without being scratched to death. Cats can be evil little creatures, but for Kairi's sake, who happened to absolutely love cats, I had to do this.

The cat put its front paws into the cage and sniffed around. It stepped in and I sprung into action. I shut and latched the cage door as quickly as I could. I almost felt bad for keeping it in there; it started meowing. But I knew Kairi would take extra special care of this cat and it was the perfect way to apologize. The sun was rising in the distance. I was so thankful that Kairi's room was on the first floor, because otherwise I would not have thought to bring this cat. I walked over to her house, feeling more pressure with each step I took.

Kairi's parents would murder me if they found me in her room this early in the morning, but I really didn't care. I had done this a million times. I tapped on her window. She was still asleep. I really didn't want to resort to coming inside on my own, but hey, she would be gone by noon, presumably. Kairi never locked it, something I constantly got onto her about. I pushed the window up and put the cat carrier down on the floor in her room and then climbed inside. I had to get over to her before she woke up and started screaming, but I felt like that was inevitable. I tried to quietly close it, but then I heard a voice.

"Vani... what are you doing?"

Of course she knew it was me. Well, it's a good thing I'm not some crazy murderer.

"I brought you a present." As if on cue, the cat meowed right after that. Kairi shot up and looked onto the floor; the dim light from outside just barely filled the room as they sun continued to rise in the sky. She got out of bed and came over to me. Kairi looked so hot in her pink pajamas. She knelt over and looked inside the cage.

"Aww, Vani, where did you find her?!" Kairi tried so exclaim quietly. The cat meowed once more.

"She likes hanging out at my house. If you would come over more often, you would know that. And hold on, how do you know it's a girl?"

Kairi shrugged. "You know why I don't come over."

"Oh, right. Brother."

Kairi opened the cage and the cat ran out. "Can I keep her?!"

"Duh."

"I'll take her with me to Twilight Town! Thank you so much!" Kairi threw her arms around me. Did she forget that she hated me? Maybe it was just too early in the morning. I knew this was a bad idea. I just knew it.

Anyway, that didn't stop me from trying to explain myself. I put my hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes. I was in 100 percent serious mode now. It was an extremely rare occurrence and I wasn't even sure how to do it without blurting out some sarcastic comment to cover up my incessant need to be manly.

"Kairi, I'm sorry. I was afraid you didn't feel the same. Yeah, it's cliché, but I don't know how else to put it. Me telling you this doesn't require any action on your part. I just wanted you to know how... I felt." I gulped. "I've liked you for a long time—even before you and Sora started dating."

"I just wish... I knew. Maybe we could have had a chance..." she stepped forward and hugged me, resting her head on my chest. I held her in my arms and for the first time, I was actually okay with showing my vulnerable side. Even though I knew that nothing could come of this right now, maybe someday we could reunite and... possibly pick up where we left off. I was willing to wait for that privilege. "I'm sorry for saying that I hate you. I really don't." Kairi told me.

"I hoped not." I whispered. I kissed her cheek and held onto her a little tighter. "I'm... going to miss you. You have to come and visit me, okay...?"

"Of course I will. Just because we have to go our separate ways doesn't mean we won't ever see each other again. Besides, I can call you and we can do face time."

I was becoming more open to the idea of a long-distance, but I didn't let the temptations get to me. Who knew where we would be in a year, or two or four? I didn't want to make any promises; I could only hope.

"I would like that." I smiled genuinely, then her lips met mine.

I could get lost in this moment...

..._oh_, shut up...

O-o-o

o-o-o

**A/N:** Phew, that took a while! Let me know what you think in the **comment box** below! I would like to thank ALL my supporters as I continue this journey through fanfiction. Actually, yesterday was the nine year anniversary (Sept. 25th, 2005) of signing up on this site (with this screen name, lol). Before this I had another screen name for about a year or two, so really I've been on this site for a freaking long time. Peace out and please don't hesitate to leave a **review**! Thanks again to TwilightIsn'tLiterature and make sure to check her page out!


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